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New videos from Neville Johnson.  These fall back into his messages on walking with God.  This was is a good intro, the real meat comes in the next two, but one at a time here.


First, we need to remember a couple things about God.  He is all powerful, all present, and all knowing.  What does this mean for us.  He can do anything and nothing is hard for Him.  He knows everything going on, and He is always there.  These seem like simple truths, but we need to believe them deep in our bones.  There is nothing too big for Him and He always is with us in everything.

Why is that important, for His presence.  We don’t always feel His presence, but He is always there.  We may think that our sins or lifestyle push Him away, but it can’t.  This is a truth we need to understand, so when we try to walk in His presence, we believe He is there with us, and it’s just us coming to notice that.

He has told you, O man, what is good;
And what does the Lord require of you
But to do justice, to love kindness,
And to walk humbly with your God? — Micah 6:8

What is required of us?  To walk with God.  That’s what God requires of us.  That is what we seek.  The way we live our lives is not walking with God.  You know those in the Bible that are said to “walk with God”.  I shouldn’t need to remind anyone reading this blog who those people are.

So we start with His presence.  He will never leave or forsake us.  Hebrews 11:6 tells us “he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.”  So we have to first believe that He is with us, but also that He rewards those who seek him.

So now that we realize again that God is always with us, we need to include Him in every little part of your life.  Doing dishes, do it with God.  Driving, talk to Him as you drive.  Putting your child to bed, pray over them.  Working, ask Him for advice.  I mean everything.  God wants to be involved in our lives.  This is a practice we must take up to begin to feel that constant presence of His.  If you include Him in your life, He will include you in His.  As the verse says:

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you — James 4:8

God is spirit, and that’s part of the issue.  We aren’t sure how to interact with that.  Luckily, part of us is Spirit as well.  Now that we know He’s with us all the time, we just need to make that connection across.  Part of that is learning to recognize His presence, but the main bridge here is our imagination.  To include Him, you have to imagine Him.  Our soul imagines that he is listening to us, as our faith tells us.  Our mind imagines He is standing beside us.  We pray and expect for Him to be there with us, talking and helping.  This isn’t pretend, but imagining God with us.  That can bridge from the soul to the spirit, since our minds have been trained that there is nothing other than the physical.

We try to make this so hard, but really it is very simple.  One of the phrases Neville said that I really thought was good is:

“Christians are really good at making simple truths complicated and we call it theology”



Not necessarily a new book out there, just new to me.  The Veil by Blake Healy is a new book that was passed on to me.  Blake has been able to see into the spirit realm since he was a small child.  This book is a story of a small portion of his experiences, where it has led him and why God gave it to him.

For the main goal of this site, it’s not as big into showing the way, teaching us to see.  Partially because his eyes were just open.  He didn’t search or pursue, it just was.  He gives some instructions, but nothing necessarily new from other things I’ve seen, even then not much instruction at all.

What I did get is:

  1. Encouragement – Reading the story of someone who does see and believes all should is encouragement.  Very honest portrayal of himself and what he has seen.
  2. What to expect – His views into the Spirit have given me a better idea what is going on.  This helps me in picturing what may be there, and validating the little bits I feel like I’ve seen.
  3. God is moving.  It’s a confirmation that God is always working in the spirit all around us, and He is working for our good.

Overall, I really recommend this book.  It’s the fastest I’ve read a book in a while.  Had trouble putting it down to do normal life stuff.  Though it’s a tad discouraging in one aspect ( only because I let the enemy tell me it is ) in that he was given this gift as a child, that is completely overshadowed by the encouragement it did give to see what is available.  I’ve found myself not only pursuing that gift more, but cleaning up my attitudes and thoughts better now that I realize what it is doing in the Spirit and how it gives the enemy a foothold to attack.

I was working my way through Ephesians, mainly because of the prayers in Ephesians 1 and 3 that Kenneth Hagin talked about in his book “The Believer’s Authority” or perhaps “I Believe in Visions”, I forget which.  These were prayers he began praying daily in search of a deeper relationship with Christ.  Sadhu Sundar Selvaraj did a similar deal after reading Kenneth Hagin’s book.

Anyway, that was why I was in Ephesians, then I hit some interesting things in chapter 3.

To me, the very least of all saints, this grace was given, to preach to the Gentiles the unfathomable riches of Christ – Ephesian 3:8

Ever stop to think about what these “unfathomable riches” might be?  Do you walk like that?  I don’t.  I walk in a very known level of riches of the church, not according to some that we can’t even imagine.  These riches are available for us.  Later in this same chapter I found another phrase like this.

And to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God. – Ephesians 3:19

Now we find the “love of Christ that surpasses knowledge”.  I only rare feel the love of Christ which fills up my own heart, much less surpassing knowledge.  To experience that, you wouldn’t even be able to think straight.  What sort of love is this.

So I just looked back and forth in this chapter thinking upon these unfathomable riches and the love that surpasses knowledge which will fill me up in fullness of God.

What did I decide?

I want them.  I want to know this love and grace that is so far beyond me.  I want to understand what we have, to overflow all that I am.

Then I found the way.

For this reason I bow my knees before the Father – Ephesians 3:14

Paul was praying that because of these unfathomable riches, that they would know this love that surpasses knowledge.  To do this, he got to his knees and asked.

That’s it.

There is our path.

It seems to obvious, too easy.  We want to earn or deserve it.  We want to find the complicated path, because we feel the easy route doesn’t work for us.

Instead, we just get on our knees and plead to the Father.

“Father, show me these riches which you have given me in Christ.  Open my heart to know this love you have shown that surpasses knowledge.  It’s only in you I can find these.”

If you think about it, unfathomable means we can’t come up with it ourselves.  There is no option but revelation from on high.  Take your knee, pour out your heart, and receive the blessings your Father wants to lavish upon you.  Paul knew this was the path.  It’s only our culture of Bible studies, conferences and speakers that feel a person must teach us.  The Holy Spirit is here to do that work.


I’ve been spending more time trying to just pray in tongues.  I actually set a time for myself each day to set aside for praying and waiting.  I know I’m typically against “pray for XX minutes”, but it’s like I’m trying to discipline myself.  Just like in running for example.  First you go for a mile, then a mile and a half.  Once you get to a point where you can go long enough, then you worry less about the distance and more about the quality, the speed, etc.

So I’m praying in tongues, and as we all probably do, my mind wanders some.  In this instance I hit on being the Bride of Christ.  As in my previous post, I am thinking about I’m not necessarily the bride of Christ just because I am saved.   As I’m pondering there and praying in tongues, that voice comes in my head.  Same voice as always.  It’s on the topic I’m thinking, but I know it wasn’t me.  Too unexpected.  It’s that voice like you said it in your head, except you didn’t.

“If you want to be my bride, then woo me”

I know…. woo.   Who says that.  I blame Sadhu Sandar Selvaraj for that sort of British type word, but that’s what came out.  Feel free to insert pursue, attract, court, or any other better sounding word here.  The concept is the same.

If you want to be the bride, give Jesus a reason to ask.  Just as Revelation said “make yourself ready”.  Clean yourself up.  Put away the sin that smells.  Set your mind and heart upon the good things to keep clean.  Cloth yourself in good works to look attractive.  Compliment the Lord, make Him feel the love you have.  Give Him gifts and speak well of Him.  Show Him off.

That all hit me in a split second and the praying in tongues went right out the window.  I love revelation like that.  It’s like it short circuits your brain as you realize all the connections that concept just made.

This is perhaps my best answer for:

  • How to free yourself from sin
  • How to clear your mind of the world
  • How to be holy.

I am Holy, because I want my Lord to fall in love with me.

It’s that simple.

I wanted to post something about being the bride, so went searching my previous posts and realized I may not have posted these revelations about the bride.  Oops.  So before my next post, you get what I may have posted before, but I want to make sure.


And…. excerpt from something that should be available later.


Although I have no clear scripture for this, I believe there is a sort of progression to our relationship with God as we mature.  First, we are believers, for we accept God, but haven’t gone too deep.  We mature into disciples who are willing to follow God.  As we give more of our lives over, we can move over to bond-servants.  This is the title many of the apostles took.  Past this, I believe there are several other categories such as the sons of God, the friends of God, and even the bride.  That last one still surprises me.  I had long been taught that the church was the bride of Christ.  I believed that until the Lord opened up this verse for me.

And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb. – Revelation 19:9

It took me a bit to catch on and I can distinctly remember when the revelation hit me.  I don’t remember what started me on this topic, but one day I found myself desiring to know about the marriage of the Lamb.  I knew the scripture was in Revelation and searched it down pretty quickly.  As I’m pondering that scripture, the middle part caught me.  Blessed are those who are invited.  Think about it.

Do you invite the bride to the wedding?

Of course not.  The wedding is for the bride, you invite the guests to be witnesses and to share in the celebration.  What we find here is that the guests of the wedding are blessed, that they get to attend the wedding.  That one little statement breaks us up into at lease three groups.  First, we have the bride of course, then those who are invited to the wedding, and then the rest that aren’t.

A couple years ago I had a dream about Heaven.  I’m going to give the short version here.  Basically, I dreamed that I had died and there was a group of us coming into Heaven.  We were brought into Heaven with a guide and begin to make our way through.  As we walked through different parts of Heaven, some of the people were split off to go to their assigned areas in Heaven.  The overriding thought I can remember having as we went through different areas of Heaven, which was a remarkably happy and peaceful place, was that I wanted to be as close to Jesus as possible.  Each time a group split off, I was glad to still be moving toward the center.

This realization that I may not be part of the bride has hit me hard.  I love God.  I do.  Yet, I obviously love myself as well, and that must be fixed.  The God of the universe is willing to call me “His beloved”, but can I say the same?  You see, many are called, but few are chosen.

I know, I disappeared again for a while.

Why… partially because I’m not “with all my heart” seeking the Lord during this last period.  When I really get focused, and focus my heart upon the Lord, He speaks.  I hear, I write, and things happen.  But it’s tough to stay focused like that.  I have an unfortunately busy life.  Mostly around work and family.  I do the things I should, and spend little time on myself, so it’s always a juggling act.  Anyway, you know the verse “if you seek me with all your heart”, well, that ALL word is the key.  Hard to get there.

The other part is that I’m editing.  Attempting to publish a book.  Not on this stuff…. not yet.  I suspect that time will come, this is more a precursor.  So, I got to a serious point where I needed to be focused.  I think I’m reaching the end of that period so I am freeing back up to wait and dig into the Lord.

There you go.  Can’t say that I’ll tell you when the book comes out, as I’m still sort of keeping this blog on the down-low.  Remember, protestant here, and some of my things would be a bit much for those around me.  Better to wake them up slowly.

I was listening to a message from Bill Johnson ( Bethel Church ).  Looks like the video’s still out on Youtube.


He told a story a little ways into it that I had heard once before but couldn’t remember where it came from.  It was probably 3rd hand I heard it from, but now from Bill it’s 2nd hand.  It was a story of an old friend of his that has passed away, he didn’t give the name.

The story was that the friend was walking through the airport with his wife, when suddenly he stopped and asked the wife to watch their luggage.  Then he started wandering around the crowds in the terminal.  His wife just watched him circle around until he came up to a man and talked to him.  He gave him a hug, chatted, and then moved on.  When he got back, his wife asked him who that was.  He said he didn’t know, it’s just that as he passed him, he smelled an aroma that he’s only ever smelt in the throne room of God.  So he knew this man was a man of prayer.


I have trouble articulating why this hits me so much.  Maybe it’s the encouragement of my spirit saying, “Why not you”.  Maybe it’s the thought of someone with the sense to feel the spiritual among the physical like I feel we should.  Maybe the idea that we can come to the throne room to the point where we can smell it.

All I know, is that it works me up.  I want to be this.  I want to walk by someone and feel/see/smell the presence of God upon their life.  I want to be so in tune with Heaven that it can’t sneak past me.

If only I can keep the conviction to continue walking the path.  I try, but I always step away.  It’s so disheartening at times, but also encouraging that our God is so gracious to keep pushing us along.

Let’s draw near to God, practice His presence until that’s all you know.

I lost it.  His presence.  And the worst part is, I didn’t realize.

I don’t know when it started.

  • Maybe when I got more caught up in the political and cultural issues in our country, though I believe part of that desire was him
  • Maybe when I got into some books too much and lost my focus
  • Maybe when I got caught up in some sin
  • Maybe when I spent my time on His work and not just with Him
  • Maybe cause I didn’t spend time in worship

Whatever the case, those times of His presence slipped away, and to my disgrace, I didn’t notice.  That is, until I slowed down one day and spent more time just loving Him.  Then when that feeling came, the pressure that tells me that my Lord is nearby, that I am ok.  Then I realized I hadn’t felt this for a while.  Weeks.  Now that I stop to put words to it, I want to cry.  How could I let it go.

So my message today is short.  Find His presence, treasure it, and keep it with you.  It requires cultivating like a plant.  Some worship, some time alone, staying away from sin, not getting too caught up in the world.  When you step away, come back as you can.  For what I’ve found is if the presence is near, so is my hope and my direction.  I’m less likely to waste my time, to miss His opportunity, and mostly to miss His voice.

Forgive me Lord.  Your grace is always so amazing.

How’s that for a title.  Coming from the guy who likes to quote things like “God is love” showing how it all boils down to love.

Well…. here we are.

I’m stuck on a passage again.  This happens to me often enough.  Any time I want to spend time reading and meditating, this is the only passage that comes to me.  I can’t move past, I can’t move no, and I can’t make sense of it.  Granted, I’ve spent a lot of my free time on my “project”, so I haven’t had as much time just sitting in the Word as I should or want.  Also I’ve been off in audio books.  I digress.

I’m writing this as much to relay some information on as to just try to get this out of my head.  Sometimes just talking about something will force you to see it a little different, to look a little closer at a word, or something like that.

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight,  so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God. – Philippians 1:9-11

As with many other passages, I saw the you “may be pure”, and it caught my attention.  Now, section by section:

“And this is my prayer”

Not a command, but a prayer.  So this is more than just “do these things” but “God help me do these things”.

“that your love may abound more and more”

We need more love.   NASB says “love may abound still more and more”.  So their love is already abounding, but we want it more, and then even more.  But how is our love to abound.

“in knowledge and depth of insight”

NASB says “true knowledge and all discernment”.  That would be epignosis, as in experiential or as I say, revelation knowledge.  This isn’t knowing facts, but having them revealed to you.  Discernment is clear enough, seeing through the muck at the truth.   So love alone is not enough.  Just growing in love doesn’t get us where we are going.  No, we need that love directed by revelation and discernment.  This is where we use the love God gave us, but also lean upon him to direct that love.  We can’t just go out and love everything more.  That’s inefficient and wasteful.  We are to be love, but the act of love must be directed as God directs.  As we learn how to apply it, we need to abound there.

“so that you may be able to discern what is best”

Again, why love through those methods above, so we can do the best we can.  We need to find what is the best that God has for us and focus there.  Practice your discernment and wisdom.  Search out insights from God and apply them.  Live the best life you can.

and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ”

Again, NASB “in order to be sincere and blameless until the day of Christ”.  Not sure why I didn’t just start with NASB.  Oh well.  First, we walk this way that we may be pure.  Why is that important, because our relationship is built upon holiness.  The pure in heart see God.  The more pure we become, the more He can step in.  Next thought, “until the day of Chirst”.  Just another verse as proof that we can walk in holiness and purity.  Paul didn’t pray that we “try to walk pure”, or we walk “in a more pure manner”, or even “we are pure when Christ comes.  No, be pure until Christ comes.  And the way to reach purity, apply your love with discernment and revelation.

“filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ”

Have to admit, I don’t have much here.  What is the fruit of righteousness?  Looking at several other verses, peace is mentioned a lot, but it seems to be the fruit of a life lived in holiness.  The preparing of your soul and spirit by staying pure before the Lord to make you into His image.

“to the glory and praise of God.”

Always to His glory.  We live, that He may be glorified.  That others may see our love, and come to know that it is merely a bare reflection of the love God showers upon us.

Love with intent.  Find the truth, apply it, and love even more.

That pesky truth…

Ok, so I’m starting a new category here.  It’s for those things that God decides to drop my way that I really didn’t want to hear… sigh.

Case in point, couple days back me and my wife were having a little spat.  Nothing big, usual stress from work, family, holidays all piling up until we each probably felt like we were doing too much.  Mumbling like “I have to do everything” may have been heard in our house.  We each had our reasons to be bitter.  It sort of just appeared quickly, not even sure how it escalated so fast.

On my side I was doing fairly well at trying to just keep my mouth shut.  I’d love to say that I show enough Jesus that I can keep a right attitude when I feel like I’m “mistreated”, but alas, no.  Instead, I just try to keep my mouth shut and not say the things I’m thinking that I am sure aren’t Godly.  The next morning after this started, I got a little break of a couple minutes, and just popped out my phone to read from a Bible app.  I’m in Phillipians 1, where I’ve been stuck for a while.  I suspect I’ll post on that reason soon enough.  Anyway, I hit this verse:

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight – Phil 1:9

I’ve been spending some time meditating upon that recently, but in this instance I didn’t get past the first 11 words or so.  Love may abound.

And so quietly and gently the Spirit asked “is your love abounding to your wife”.


There are some days I regret actually listening, especially when it grieves my pride so much.  Of course the regret is temporary and totally my old man speaking.  So gently the next couple hours I worked myself back into love.  I set aside my grievances, even knowing that some may be valid and I might have to deal with being “mistreated” again in a similar manner, but this day, learning to love was more important.

Pesky truth, why can’t you just let me sulk.