Archive for October, 2012


So I just started listening to just the first part of Harvest Fest conference from this year, and the first message is Rick Joyner talking.  I’m all of about one hour in and it’s already set me a fire.  He began talking about some of the visions the Lord has given him, and the prophecies that are getting closer as the harvest gets near.  One of the subjects he talks about is back to one of my favorites, the bond-servant role.  It’s like I went from being a little discouraged to pumped up in about 10 minutes.  I’m all fired up again looking at this bond-servant role and knowing that it’s the keep to so much more in the Lord.  He sort of his the same levels I’ve spoken of before, believe, disciple, bond-servant.  Not all believers are disciples, and not all disciples are bond-servants.  Christ told his disciples that they must take up their cross daily, and I need to awaken each morning with a new motivation.  Instead of waking up, and trying to be excited for the day and the possibilities, I should awake and problem “This is a great day, what would you like for me to do today Lord?”  You see, it’s no longer about what I want.  That only comes in after I know my master’s work is done.  These night time periods of indulging myself because I’ve earned it need to start going away. It’s time to begin sacrificing areas of my life to minister to the Lord.

It’s crazy, I’m at home watching my daughter and just walking around the house talking to God and praising Him, and it’s such a dramatic change.  Times like this I know the Spirit is yelling inside of me, there’s no other explanation.  I suddenly have both excitement and peace.  Excitement for the opportunity, peace for the presence.  I know that things will go well in the end, for my Lord, my beloved is here with me.

So I’ve been remembering back to something that Neville said with this whole waiting on the Lord bit.  He said that a lot of people will make it about 3 months, at this point they won’t have seen much and they’ll give up and stop fighting for it.

Well, I made it 4.

You can sort of tell in my last posts about how far I made it.  Since then I had a sort of decline.  I didn’t go running off like I have in the past, at least not for long periods of time, but I did sort of back off from the zeal.  I let myself try to do more of the motions than to be excited and … militant is the best word I can think of.  To go out and try to grab things for myself.

Often I find I would get distracted by either a book I’m reading, or get discouraged from a tough time I’m having, and find myself just looking for comfort elsewhere.  It gets hard to rely on the Lord for comfort, which really doesn’t make sense when you think about it, but there it is.  I wish I had been writing more during that time so I could explain and remember things better.

I do know that I wasn’t ready for the bond-servant role, which is really the beginning of it all. I hold onto my life too strongly, whether that was the book I’m interested rathering than spending time with the Lord, taking that extra time I have and just sitting with my wife to relax, or in may cases, not being bold enough to actually take time away from my family to focus upon the Lord.

I want to overcome, as with all the churches in Revelation, I want to overcome to times I live in, the struggles that come to me.  There’s no reason that I should still struggle with all the same things, Christ is in me.  I have His strength to sustain me.