Archive for November, 2013

You search the Scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; it is these that testify about Me; and you are unwilling to come to Me so that you may have life. – John 5:39-40

We may sing “It’s all about you Jesus”, say our prayers that it’s all about Him, and we preach that, but when we get down to it, do we really live it.  When we get sick, when a job is going rough, when just life is happening, is it about Jesus, or do we quickly turn to our religion to explain our issues and solve our problems?

Growing up I often said that Christianity is a relationship, not a religion.  Such truth, but yet I never really feel like I have lived it.  Think about it.  Would you describe your faith as a relationship?  In a relationship, you see the other person, you talk to Him, you share your life together.  Most of our walks is a pretty one way street.  We tell God things, but we don’t hear back.  He may see us, but we don’t see Him.  We’re guided by vague feelings, clues, and the best our intellect can do.  It’s not enough.  We put our faith in the scriptures, but the scriptures just point us to Jesus.

I find whenever I get together with believers that all too often I dislike the conversation.  We talk about church, sports, people, work, all sorts of other things.  I’m bored.  Actually, that probably doesn’t give it credit, it’s more of a disdain.  I think I’m starting to figure out what’s going on.  I want to talk about Jesus.  All these other things are trivial.  There’s a time and place, but I want more.

I want to speak of Jesus.  All the scriptures, the written word, point to Him, the Living word.  In fact, the Bible is a part of Him.  I want to talk about Song of Solomon, that Jesus is my beloved.  “I am my beloved’s and his desire is for me”.  I want to talk about how Jesus was there when we made.  He was there when “men hated the light”.  Then my beloved, my Jesus, made a way back.  My beloved and been there every step of the way to bring us back into a relationship with Him.  I’m not talking Salvation, I’m talking walking with Adam and Eve in the Garden relationship.  Perhaps even more.  Perhaps the mystery Paul spoke of the prophets looked toward, “Christ in us”.  Man wasn’t made for salvation, that whole thing we’ve made so central was a fix to get us back to our original purpose, to become Sons of God.  And to be that, we must know Him.  In each step, it must be to draw me back to Jesus.  To open the door, to let Him come in.

I want to speak of Jesus, the lover of my soul.  The purpose of my heart.  My portion.  My hope.  My desire.

I want to speak of Jesus, because when I speak of Him, I feel alive.


So I’m struggling.  It really convicts me to read back in posts or in a journal to see that I feel like I’m in the same spot as months or even years ago.  It just seems wrong.  Mainly, I think I’m just not consistant.  and I let sin in.  I’m making a big effort on both, but I’ll talk about that more another time.

Here I want to go into Waiting.  I’m listening back to Sadhu Sundar Selvaraj again, and realizing that I keep messing it up.  At times I’ve made waiting a task.  I did 20 minutes, mark that off, why am I not more Godly?  Other times I’ve tried, but in the wrong way.  I try to force things or don’t have my heart in it.  So I was going back over some basics.  When he defined waiting on the Lord, he looked up several of the words used and used those or other things, but here’s the basic concepts for waiting.

  1. Be still
  2. Be quiet
  3. Be alone
  4. Anticpate of the Lord
  5. Be Humble
  6. Look for God and not an experience

Basically, make sure you’re along in a quiet place and stay still.  I started actually turning my phone to do not disturb.  I usually shoot for early morning, so I don’t get much but even emails may buzz and throw me.  I want no interruptions.

Humility.  Not always my strongest suit.  In this case, we know that everything that can come is from God.  We don’t deserve anything, we can’t earn it.  For now I just try to acknowledge that I’m here waiting for Him to speak.  I know its only by His grace that I will get anything.

Anticipate the Lord.  Neville talks about emotions.  If then you try to clear your mind, you focus upon the Lord.  Haven’t really gotten this down.  I either try to visualize Him, or just set my emotions/heart upon Him.  I try to sit in anticipation that He may show up.  That I may hear from Him.  Love Him.  That’s so important.

Looking for God.  One thing he empasized is that God is not an entertainer.  So if you’re looking for a vision for a vision’s sake, it won’t come.  If you want to see Heaven, it probably won’t happen.  God isn’t here to cater to our entertainment.  So I just make a point that I want God, and only God.  All these things are great, but my base goal is to come to know Him, to be with Him.

So I wait.

The Spirit and the bride say, “Come.” – Revelation 22:17

I like to listen to Paul Keith Davis School of the Spirit.  Since I drive a bit, I download them after the fact and listen to them much like I do so many other things.  In this last one he had Kent Mattox speaking.  There was a number of good things, but one that I really like at the end.

He was talking about worship.  How for Him that’s really his only entrance into God’s presence.  One day he found himself with some free time at home.  He reached for the remote to watch TV, and then thought, you know what, I just want to praise God.  So instead he just sang a song to the Lord.  He said after the first song the presence came in.  So he sang another, and it got heavier.  After a third it was even stronger.  At this point he is thinking how glad he was that he didn’t turn on the TV.

Then God spoke and said “Will you just sing me another?”.

I can’t remember if that was the exact wording, but the feeling it portrayed was that God was enjoying the worship so much he asked him to sing another song.  Of course at this point it just rocked him.  I can understand.  To have the God of the universe say, “hey, can you sing me one more song, I’m really enjoying this”.

So when you worship, do you worship like this.  Do a worship a living God who is listening, or do you just like the music?  Do you worship as if He is really listening, because He is.


I was listening to a message from Kent Maddox, and he brought up the Yoido Full Gospel church in South Korea. I had never heard of it before, I think it’s the biggest church in the world. That’s not what’s important for what I want to say here.
 The part that I did like is when he said how they handle counseling. Supposedly, if you go ask for counseling, they ask if you’ve been to prayer mountain. If you haven’t, they tell you to go fast and pray for two days, and if you still need counseling after that to come back.
 Imagine how many problems that could solve in our churches if we would put two days aside to seek The Lord. I dare to say that very few American Christians even fast for a day, much less put it aside to The Lord for a day of prayer. Here I am doing a partial day fast and still working. I’m guessing The Lord doesn’t scoff, but what I do is typical of us. We play like we sacrifice, like The Lord is lord of our lives, then we got Him in as it matches up with our schedule.