This was actually intended to be more of a humorous post, but a little bit of truth jumped into it today while listening to Neville.  I believe his statement from a message I heard today was something like, “If you are really searching for truth, then the Holy Spirit will be more than happy to teach you”.  The point being, that if you are open to the truth, willing to put what you believe aside in search of truth itself, then God will teach you.  It seems like an obvious thing, until it happens and you realize this isn’t so hard.  How do I describe this…

The person in an addiction who says it isn’t hurting anyone.

The wife who reads about being kind and submissive, but berates her husband because he cannot remember everything she expects him to.

The evangelical who reads of the baptism of the spirit and decides it’s not that important.

On and on and on

Those words from the Lord that speak to us, but go against what we believe is right.  Often it’s not even sin, but our own theology that stops us.

So back to me.  I’m a little bitter lately.  I am.  Hate to say it, but there it is.  Part of the reason I haven’t posted much at all is because I’m just that busy.  If you read this, it should be pretty obvious I don’t exactly go proofreading what I right, it’s pretty much stream of consciousness.  So it moved to a new level lately.  I’ve spoken of my average days, well lately I’ve become known as the guy who writes 1am emails for work.  Why, because that’s my first time to get free to make up some work time I missed earlier in the day for other reasons.  I stay busy.  And not necessarily for great reasons.

So yesterday I’m going along, cleaning the house.  Worked all day, got home, ate dinner, started cleaning, for a while.  In the middle of this, I’m trying to talk to the Lord.  I’m trying to not be bitter here, but bitterness is a sneaky little booger.  So I found myself asking, “Lord, how am I supposed to keep a good attitude when I’m just constantly working?”.

Well, should’ve known better than to ask.

“What’s your motive?  Do you do this work because you have to or because you want to?”

Ouch.

There’s some feeling behind the words, they hit directly home to me, but written it may not be as obvious.  Basically the Spirit was saying if my motive was to work hard to bless my family by doing all I could, I wouldn’t have an attitude issue”.  Let me tell you, that’s not what the bitter guy wants to hear.  So here I am, the Holy Spirit just nonchalantly smacks me down, and I’m thinking to myself, why did I ask.

Moral of the story, make sure you want to know the truth before you ask.

Real moral, the truth is always worth it.