Category: Into the Kingdom


This is a quick recount of revelation that hit me a couple days ago.  First let’s start with the base, then I’ll explain.

Jesus went away from there, and withdrew into the district of Tyre and Sidon. And a Canaanite woman from that region came out and began to cry out, saying, “Have mercy on me, Lord, Son of David; my daughter is cruelly demon-possessed.” But He did not answer her a word. And His disciples came and implored Him, saying, “Send her away, because she keeps shouting at us.” But He answered and said, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.” But she came and began to bow down before Him, saying, “Lord, help me!” And He answered and said, “It is not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the dogs.” But she said, “Yes, Lord; but even the dogs feed on the crumbs which fall from their masters’ table.” Then Jesus said to her, “O woman, your faith is great; it shall be done for you as you wish.” And her daughter was healed at once. – Matthew 15:21-28

I had heard speakers speak of this passage.  I’m not sure who I picked it up from, but a quick search put Andrew Wommack up near the top.  He is a well known for this healing ministry, and mainly the divine health he walks under.  One of the phrases I know from his talks is “You’ve already got it”.  Basically at salvation we received the full “salvation” of payment of sins, healing, deliverance, etc.  Basically the full definition of the Greek word Sozo ( if I remember right ).   In light of this passage, the truth that healing was the “children’s bread” has sparked a number of healing ministries.  The thought being that this is something that is expected, basically a right of the believer.

Again, I had heard this, but haven’t walked in it myself.  I had actually had a conversation on this topic with some family just a couple days back.  During the occasion, I was around a number of family members that had been passing around a cold.  Sure enough, about 2 or 3 days  into this, I noticed I was feeling achy, a little sore, and strangely cold inside a house where others seemed to be warm.  I know the feelings.  It’s that first stage of the cold where it’s starting to take hold and things are about to go downhill.

At a certain instance, I needed to step outside to go grab something from the care.  During this, I was thinking about walking in divine health and God’s healing.  If this is something we have available, I feel like I should be fighting for it.  I’m tired of watching so many close to me struggle with sickness and disease.  On the way to the car, I begin thinking through verses about healing.  That’s when the passage above pops into my heal.  “Children’s bread”.  Hmm, as I pondered that, another verse popped into my head as bread struck some memory.

Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! – Matthew 7:9-11

And the revelation fell with an almost audible thump.  I jerked to a thought with the shock of it.  Could it really be that simple, could it match up just like that?  But the truth in my spirit cried out with .. joy.

You see, if healing is part of God’s “bread” to His children, and we know that a good father is happy to provide bread to his child when asked, how can we doubt his desire for us.  How can we not expect such a good God to heal us?  I know these verses speak of more than just healing, and more than just gifts, but I cannot argue the intersection.

When I need healing, I ask God.  God, being a good father, and healing being part of the bread He has for His children, will happily give it forth.  So I should ask and expect it.

So I did.  As we continued through the day, I got a chance to just look to the Lord and ask for Him to heal this cold.  The feelings were still there.  So as we talked and did things, I kept trying to look to the Lord, picture Jesus.  Each time I was able to focus upon Him with feeling, the feelings would decrease.  I think that was just my method of faith.  As I focused upon the Lord and felt His presence, I knew His goodness would take care of me.  Over the next 15 minutes or so, I felt fine.  Several days later, I’m still fine.  A little tired out, but then again, I’ve been around a lot of family for the holiday.

So… to be picky… I know there are some times where healing might not come.  I can think of some instances from ministers I know to walk closely with the Lord where they prayed for someone and God would not heal them.  Those cases were pretty rare and had a very specific reason.  Usually a problem on the part of the person.  The way I see it ( my “theology for now” ), is that it is expected for God to heal.  So I trust Him.  If it doesn’t seem to be happening, then I also trust Him to reveal to me what is wrong.  He is a good God.  If I am not receiving what He told me, then there is a better reason and I will wait upon Him to tell me.

I suspect, just like any revelation, this will be tested a lot and soon.  I’m not looking forward to that.  Any attempt at drawing closer to the Lord almost always leads me to a period of wilderness, and I’m not always successful there.  Lord help me.

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The Spirit gave me this little nugget while raking leaves today.  I was thinking how I’ve often heard the response from people who don’t believe you can see God ( while living at least ) that “you can’t see God and live”.  The verse they’re referencing is from Exodus.

But,” he said, “you cannot see my face, for no one may see me and live.” – Exodus 33:20

There’s a lot of arguments I’ve heard to go against this, but I had an interesting new one today.  As I had that thought, the Spirit said to me, “Doesn’t that sound familiar”.  I thought so too.  It sounded similar to the tree of knowledge.

But you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.” – Genesis 2:17

But wait, Adam and Eve didn’t actually die when they ate from the tree.  Yet that’s what God said.  We realize that the death was more spiritual.  Their physical boides continue on.

So what’s to keep us from applying the same principle.  When they ate the fruit, a part of them ( spiritual ) died.  So when we see God, a part of us ( old man ) can no longer live.  When you come face to face with God, something will die.  It could be you, but it could also be the flesh in you that dies and gives way to something greater.

Ok, so I’ve had it for a bit, but finally started reading Gazing into Glory by Bruce Allen.  I knew of Bruce from the Lancaster prophetic conferences that he did with Sadhu Sundar Selvaraj and Neville Johnson for years, but never really listened much to him.  So I went back to look at the intro and realized this book was very relevant for my quest, so I started working through it slowly.  And slowly it was.  Like most good books, I could only go for about 10-15 minutes at a time before I had to stop and chew on things a while.  I actually haven’t finished, but I think I’m past the relevant parts for this post.

Guess what most of the book was about.  Seeing God, moving into the Spirit, working with God.  You know, all the stuff I’ve been pursuing.  Here’s some basic notes I took along the way.

  • First key – Passion.  Search with all your heart
  • Second key – Pure in heart shall see God
  • Third key – Obedience
  • A lot of talk about sanctifying our imagination.  Watch what you put into your mind, focus on Jesus.  ( Take every thought captive )
  • “Imagination is reality according to God”
  • “You’re as close to God as you want to be”
  • “Jesus is no respecter of persons”
  • Begin to practice His presence, focusing upon an image of Jesus in your imagination.  When you read the Bible, picture it.  When you’re longing for something from God, imagine it occurring.
  • Passion, passion, passion.

So if you’ve read much of my stuff, basically all the same stuff I’ve been taking from others.   Same things I’ve been trying to work toward.  This was a nice affirmation that I’m on the right track.  Almost everything he was saying, I could “nod” my head at as something I knew that I should be doing.  Sometimes it’s just nice to get another person’s input and realize you aren’t so far off.

The other encouraging thing was his story.  He worked his way into this.  He didn’t start with some big supernatural encounter as many others I’ve read.   He didn’t have a voice speak out to start talking.  No, he heard some of these truths and began to apply them in his life until he broke through.

It was a bit different than Neville or Sadhu, so that was good.  Followed more along the lines of Neville.  Use your imagination, sanctify it, focus it upon God.  If you’re passionate enough and stick with it, God will use that.

For me what I’ve taken is I’m falling short on two things here.  First the passion.  I get it for a couple weeks here or there, but don’t keep it strong like I should until I break through.  Second, focusing upon Jesus.  I’ll do it for a couple days, but it’s tough.  It’s tough to leave so much else out of your mind and focus to keep it upon the Lord.  Strange thing is when I do it, it continues to be more and more real.  Often I’ll stop and focus upon the Lord for a couple minutes and having this wave of love and peace flow through me, as if He’s right there ( which of course He is ).  It’s like each time I come back to these things, they’re a little more real.  If I can just hold firm this time.

 

 

 

 

 

Let’s get real.

I was listening to Bobby Conner yesterday

 

Gotta love Bobby Conner.  I actually met him once and he prophesied over me.  That an event would happen, but not so much what it means or what will occur because of it. Still waiting on that to see.  Anyway, I’m listening to him and he brings up a scripture I know well.

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. – Jeremiah 29:12-13

Nothing big and new here, but just re-emphasizing this for me.  If you want to find the Lord, then you must seek with ALL your heart.  There’s no half-hearted effort to be had here.  All or nothing.  This was just one of like 5 times I had to stop the video in just the first 30 minutes or so.  So many good little nuggets.  Anyway, it just hit me again how important this is.  I’m getting more desperate and focused, which is good, but I need to push deeper.

Not sure if you saw this video I posted a while back:

https://wordpress.com/post/waitwithme.wordpress.com/630

Looks like the video link doesn’t work anymore, I probably have it saved somewhere if you need it.  It was Neville Johnson’s son(Mark) talking about how his eyes were opened.  Basically he got determined enough and he knew one of the keys to God was sacrifice.  So he took a show he watched with his dad often, and put that time aside to spend with the Lord.  This came to mind recently as I was thinking about the Old Testament.  There are all these sacrifices and offerings they give which are representations of spiritual sacrifices, yet only one of them was Jesus.  The Sin or Trespass(forgive me, don’t want to go digging right now).  But there were others.

God is big on sacrifice.

I’m ready for something new.  I’m ready to stop flopping around in the same area and listening to all these things but seeing so few of them.  Let’s take Mark’s approach here.  We will find God when we search with all our heart.  So let’s pick out something in our heart that isn’t necessary.  Not family or job ( well, maybe job ), but something not required.  TV show, books, hobbies, etc.  I am not saying to cut it all out ( at least not right now ), but pick out something big and important to you.  Something you desire.  A good example for me is audiobooks.  I love to listen to them as I mentioned.  I’ll go little periods without, but always fall back.  Pick out a thing or two and commit it to God.  I’m not saying forever, just long enough.  I would suggest picking something that frees up time, because you need to put that time into God.  Praise, worship, prayer, and especially just waiting upon Him.  I’ve actually got a couple things in mind, one which is not exactly a sin, but close enough it doesn’t count as the type of sacrifice I’m meaning.  But others do.

Now take that sacrifice, stand before the Lord, and tell Him you will set that aside until He moves.  How long?  As long as it takes.

I can’t stand living like this much longer.

You in?

 

Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Or what man is there among you who, when his son asks for a loaf, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, he will not give him a snake, will he? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him! – Matthew 7:7-11

Too often we look at scripture and match it up to our experience.  In this case it says that “whoever asks receives”.  Well I know I’ve asked God to heal someone and they weren’t, so my experience says there must be more to that verse.  This intrinsically leads me to not believe in this verse until I can wrap my mind around what makes it not happen.  I don’t understand it, so I don’t believe it.

Yet, the Bible says it.  Something I started catching onto a couple years back is that it doesn’t matter what our experience tells us.  We don’t take the Word and run it through our experience to understand it.  We’re just human.  We don’t have the experience and knowledge to do that.  It’s great when I can understand it fully and know exactly how it works, but even there I must be careful.  When I take a set of verses and say I know how something works, I’m looking more at a formula and less at a person.  So what the Spirit brought again to my mind today is to forget what I know(or more accurately what I think I know).  Forget it.  If the Bible says it and I don’t understand, so what.  Believe.  As I believe something, then I can start understanding.

Now, let’s apply this to my journey.

  • I’m asking to hear and see God in a more intimate way.
  • I’m seeking after a closer walk with Him, to see Him face to face.
  • I’m knocking upon the doors of heaven that I may enter and know my family and my home.

how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him”

I am asking to know my Father who loves me.  Basically, I’m asking for eternal life.  I know that’s His will, I know that is what is good for me.  Jesus said those who ask receive.  That means I will get my wish, find what I seek, and the door will be opened.  It’s not a question anymore, just a timing.  What does that mean?  That means I pray differently.  I seek different.  I pray with confidence in God’s word.  I seek expecting it to happen.  All I’m doing it aligning my life with God to speed up this process that I may know Him better.

God will answer, He’s promised.

 

It was also about these men that Enoch, in the seventh generation from Adam, prophesied, saying, “Behold, the Lord came with many thousands of His holy ones, to execute judgment upon all, and to convict all the ungodly of all their ungodly deeds which they have done in an ungodly way, and of all the harsh things which ungodly sinners have spoken against Him.” – ‭‭Jude‬ ‭1:14-15‬ ‭NASB‬‬

Have you caught on that I like lists?

1. Enoch prophesied – this is our first indication that Enoch was more than just someone who pleased God. Not sure if I’d say he is a prophet, but he prophesied of the end times, and it’s important enough to show up in scripture.  I personally don’t think he was called as a prophet(not immediately).  In one of those verse on spiritual gifts you get the 5-fold offices, prophet, apostle, evangelist, etc.  I don’t think he was necessarily one of those.  I think he walked close to God and as you do that, God begins to manifest out of you. Was it not 1 Corinthians 13 that told us that love is better than all the spiritual gifts?  Because love is God, and the spirit will move in that, not just in gifts but in the spirit itself.

2.  Where did this quote come from?  Ever wonder about that?  Well, there’s a book of Enoch. We know from history this was one of the important books to Jews in Jesus time but it was lost for a long time and only popped back up in the last 100 years or less.   This is a quote directly from that book which in my eyes gives it a lot of credibility. It’s not the Bible, but neither are a lot of other books we read.

Ok, short list.  But this is the direction I am heading next.  The Book of Enoch.  I’ve already started reading it ( I read part of it before ).  Unfortunately this will take time for me to go slowly and think about it all.  I’m mainly looking for hints on His walk.  Not much there in the first couple chapters.

 

So next I want to go into the book of Enoch for a while. You can find it ——.

As I was waiting on the Lord today, I was reminded of something Neville Johnson said in his series, Laying Proper Foundations, and basically what he said is that God cannot bring you into the Spirit world while you have certain.. we’ll say wounds.  I can’t really think of the word, but unrepentant sins, areas in your life your susceptible to the enemy, things that haven’t been worked out.  To do so is dangerous because you can so easily be decieved.  After hearing this again, I had to go back before the Lord and lay some things down.  There are some attitudes that I have held lately that are not healthy or Godly.  I had to give those up.  You know, it’s really hard to give things up when you are convinced you’ve been wronged.  You want it to be made right, not to let it go.

But I did.

I think. 🙂

So I was reminded of that again today.  How there’s a certain level of holiness required to get closer to God.  You don’t have to be sinless to know Him, to be used by Him, but there is only so much He can do when you are serving two masters.  I believe Paul Keith Davis liked to call this the Thrones of our Soul.

Do you have an area that you are currently in sin, or fall to easily into sin in?  Are you living with attitudes of the enemy.  Bitterness, regret, envy, lust.

Give them up.  Unless you can come clean, you can’t come far.

Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it? – Luke 14:28

This is actually a pretty straightforward deal, but it stuck out enough today that I just wanted to put it down.  Listening to Neville Johnson again, and as he was talking about getting into the Spirit, he jumped on the heart for a minute.  The heart is sort of the bridge between the soul and spirit.  It’s a little of both when you see the heart mentioned in scriptures.  Interesting thought, but one of the side comments he mentioned was “when your conscious is clear, there is a bridge opened in the spirit”.

Makes perfect sense to me.  When I’m unrepentant, I can’t seem to be with God.  I’ve noticed this a bit.  You’ve probably heard me mention that when I get off away from God, it’s like I don’t try, cause I don’t really play the “quiet time” game.  Need to clarify, nothing wrong with quiet time, I’m speaking of the routine that we’re supposed to do this set of things everyday.  When I’m off in sin, it just doesn’t work.  When I come to God and repent, suddenly it’s clearer.  I can feel His presence, I can hear Him speak.

So I guess I should make sure that early in this process you need to repent of everything.  That’s really part of the openness/honesty, and even bond servant.  If you’re not clear before God, you can’t hear.

If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. – John 15:7

This is where it began.  I heard this in a sermon recently and had been thinking about this off and on.  This is one of those verses where we try to spiritualize it, otherwise, it’s hard to explain.  “Ask and it will be done”?  That’s not something we see, so we can’t take this at face value.  Instead it must mean that when we really get into God, when He is our desire(“I will give you the desire of your heart”), then we will ask what He wants, and it will get answered.  Tell me, have you seen that either?  No, no.  This is more.  When the Word says something, you should believe it.  So that tells me there’s something to abiding and the Word.

Read Psalm 119 and see what David said of God’s commandments.  Go to Proverbs and find Soloman’s thoughts on wisdom

For wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her – Proverbs 8:11

We know from Rick Joyner’s book, true wisdom is Jesus.  Oh, I’m sure I could track down plenty of scripture, but the Final Quest made it so personal.  Revelation is like wisdom, as revelation is the revealing of truth to your heart, and who is truth, that’s right, Jesus.  He is the Word in flesh.  He is truth.  He is wisdom.  When you were young, did you ever mix all the drinks at the soda fountain together.  Yeah, Jesus is sort of like that, all this amazing stuff in one, without upsetting your stomach.

Ok, so this is one of those train of thought messages.  I start by thinking of Jesus abiding, and even more the word abiding in us.  That led me to revelation, truth.  Next came the parable of the sower.  When you get truth, it can become revelation ( seeds that sprout ) or just die on the road (eaten by the birds).  The devil wants to steal truth from you before it roots in.  Even if it starts to grow, he’ll make you busy with the worries of the world, or keep you shallow so it can’t go big.  For us to keep hold of truth and have it grow, we need to protect it and nurture it.  Treat it like the gold it is.  You can’t just go “oh that’s cool” then get back to your life.  Spend time with it

Why is this so important?  Well it’s like the Holy Spirit plugged the pieces together, and much better than I am right now.  As I meditated upon the word dwelling in me, it made me think of it living there.  As a plant, it needs room to grow, nourishment, time, attention.  If I think of it like a person, and I want it to abide, then I need to draw it in, make space for it, love it, protect it.  Basically make a home for it.  I don’t just want it hidden in my heart, or planted, or just held; I want it rooted in, growing, expanding.  I want it to paint the walls, decorate a room, plant a garden.  That’s the sort of abiding we need.  We need it so entrenched in our hearts that we can be transformed by it.  For when the word abides in you, you can ask what you wish and it’ll be done.  So is the main thing that we can ask and get what we want?  No.  That’s just a side-effect of relationship.  What we’re talking about here is authority and relationship.  There are privileges and expectations that come with those.  That is what I want.  I want the relationship itself, not the perks.

And to get there, I need the word to abide.  So when revelation comes, when you see that truth in the scripture leap into your heart and teach you something new, don’t let it go.  Don’t just say “cool” and move back to your life.  Cherish it.  Hold on and fight for it.  Keep thinking over it, write it down, whatever it takes so that it can take root in your heart.  For me, writing seems to be part of it.  I just realized how much I need to hold on, as I have lost so much.  And if there’s somewhere really good to start on making sure I hold onto it, it’s the realization that I need to hold onto truths to be transformed.

Been off for a bit.  Partially it’s because of my other project, and partially because of some life changes that have been going on.  The biggest one that affects me is a possible job change.  I’ve been at my current job for a long time, over a decade.  I’m well established, I’ve done well, worked my way up, and have been taken care of, but it’s hard.  That’s another story for another day, but leads me up to this.  As with any change going on, what’s the thing you do, you pray and ask God what to do.  Add it to your prayer list.  You pray each day about it.  I can see the prayers now

“God should I take this job”

“God, show me the path”

“God, if this is your will, open up the door”

“God, if this isn’t your will, close the door”

“God I trust you, I know you’ll let me know”

And we pray.  And we pray.  Then we post a message on facebook asking for our friends to pray for our “unmentioned request”.  And then we look at all the goods and bads, ask advice of our family and friends, and make the best choice knowing that God has directed us.

..

Except, I can’t do it.

This is our start.  We start with our prayers to God.  We make our list, kneel down, and pray through them each day.  If we’re really Godly, we make our list of prayers for the week, because it’s just too much for one day.  We ask others to pray thinking that the more people that make a request to God, the more likely an answer.  Then we tweak the variables.  Maybe the combination of enough people and fasting will do it.  Maybe I need to give God more time.  If we’re not careful, it because a recipe for getting something from God.

As you become a Christian, you may have to start here.  Look at the Lord’s prayer.  It’s a pretty simple run through. Praise, adoration, repentence, asking, etc.  But then we try to apply that.  I think it’s a good model, but only as a model.  If it becomes an outline, you risk losing the relationship and making a transaction.

So no, I have trouble with this now.  I can’t just sit and run through a list, ask God to do things, and then move on.  My relationship is more precious.  So, let me think, what did I do this last time…

Funny thing is, I didn’t go praying every day during my quiet time.  I didn’t right it down or go broadcasting to others.  Family knew, but I didn’t ask others.  I trusted God.  I brought it to Him a couple times in passing, until it was getting close and I knew I really needed to hear His heart.  So one day I found myself home alone, which doesn’t happen that often and realized, now’s the time.  Now I hope I can convey this somehow, I really don’t have a handle on it myself in my mind, but here goes.  I was alone, and not rushed.  Both are still very important for me.  I need my mind to be quiet.  Then I sit, kneel, whatever.  Basically get into a position that I can be comfortable and not think about it.  Often if it’s “shorter” I’ll kneal.  If I’m waiting on God for a possibly longer time, I try to sit somewhere, just what I do.

Then I go to Him.  I don’t ask God to come, I don’t just start talking, but I lower myself.  I’m not important.  What I actually do is imagine myself first in my garden.  It’s a place I feel like the Lord has taken me before (only in my imagination, but isn’t that as real as anything). I come in, basically I imagine myself walking into the scene, and then I heard over to where I can picture Jesus.  For me it’s normally over in a certain spot, often I’ll imagine myself sitting by Him.  This is the first part that is hard to explain.  I don’t force it.  I open up the picture in my mind and what I’m going for, but then I sort of wait and see.  What it’s really doing inside is I’m opening myself up to the Lord.  I’m setting aside all my physical things, my worries, etc, and coming to just sit before Jesus.  Typically I’ll find some spot where I feel like I’m sitting before, next to, near,  the Lord.  Then I just sit for a minute and love Him.

Then we chat.  No, I’m not giving you a formula, I’m trying to give you a relationship. Sometimes I have to start with forgiveness.  I like it better when I can just come and talk.  In this case I worship him for a minute, and then I ask Him if I can come before the throne.  Remember the verse “come boldly before the throne of grace”.  The answer is always yes(at least the times I get an answer), but some reason reason I ask.  Maybe because I want Jesus to be with me.  I don’t feel like I should come before the throne on my own, something I do.  Then again I tend to have to imagine it.  I can only do that, because I’ve felt once before the Lord took me there in my imagination, so I just remember it the way it was.  Very unclear..  Let’s get that straight.  These are mostly fuzzy pictures with sort of a general direction and something up there.  I am not in a vision, I haven’t been caught up, I just feel like in my Spirit I go there, but using my imagination.  Think what you wish.

Then I bring my requests before God, and I wait.  Sometimes there’s nothing, sometimes there’s a lot.  Often in this sort of setting I’ve had a lot of back and forth with the Lord, jumped topics etc.  In this case, I brought it before Him and waited.  As I did, there were a lot of things that came to mind.  Some of them were things like my “other project” that requires more time.  Me having time to wait on Him.  Being available.  What I realized is I felt the Lord was showing me all the things I would have available if I were to take the new job. It frees me up for the things that He’s been leading me.  It lined up with some prophecy I had.  It lined up with some of the things I’ve felt God was personally leading me.

And so the decision was made.  I didn’t have any actual words this time, just the aligning of vision, and the peace that comes with the spirit speaking to you.

Since then there’s been a lot of doubts come on, a lot of questions, and yet, i haven’t wavered in the end.  The basic vision is clear and there I go.