Category: The quest to walk with God


New videos from Neville Johnson.  These fall back into his messages on walking with God.  This was is a good intro, the real meat comes in the next two, but one at a time here.

 

First, we need to remember a couple things about God.  He is all powerful, all present, and all knowing.  What does this mean for us.  He can do anything and nothing is hard for Him.  He knows everything going on, and He is always there.  These seem like simple truths, but we need to believe them deep in our bones.  There is nothing too big for Him and He always is with us in everything.

Why is that important, for His presence.  We don’t always feel His presence, but He is always there.  We may think that our sins or lifestyle push Him away, but it can’t.  This is a truth we need to understand, so when we try to walk in His presence, we believe He is there with us, and it’s just us coming to notice that.

He has told you, O man, what is good;
And what does the Lord require of you
But to do justice, to love kindness,
And to walk humbly with your God? — Micah 6:8

What is required of us?  To walk with God.  That’s what God requires of us.  That is what we seek.  The way we live our lives is not walking with God.  You know those in the Bible that are said to “walk with God”.  I shouldn’t need to remind anyone reading this blog who those people are.

So we start with His presence.  He will never leave or forsake us.  Hebrews 11:6 tells us “he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him.”  So we have to first believe that He is with us, but also that He rewards those who seek him.

So now that we realize again that God is always with us, we need to include Him in every little part of your life.  Doing dishes, do it with God.  Driving, talk to Him as you drive.  Putting your child to bed, pray over them.  Working, ask Him for advice.  I mean everything.  God wants to be involved in our lives.  This is a practice we must take up to begin to feel that constant presence of His.  If you include Him in your life, He will include you in His.  As the verse says:

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you — James 4:8

God is spirit, and that’s part of the issue.  We aren’t sure how to interact with that.  Luckily, part of us is Spirit as well.  Now that we know He’s with us all the time, we just need to make that connection across.  Part of that is learning to recognize His presence, but the main bridge here is our imagination.  To include Him, you have to imagine Him.  Our soul imagines that he is listening to us, as our faith tells us.  Our mind imagines He is standing beside us.  We pray and expect for Him to be there with us, talking and helping.  This isn’t pretend, but imagining God with us.  That can bridge from the soul to the spirit, since our minds have been trained that there is nothing other than the physical.

We try to make this so hard, but really it is very simple.  One of the phrases Neville said that I really thought was good is:

“Christians are really good at making simple truths complicated and we call it theology”

 

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Not necessarily a new book out there, just new to me.  The Veil by Blake Healy is a new book that was passed on to me.  Blake has been able to see into the spirit realm since he was a small child.  This book is a story of a small portion of his experiences, where it has led him and why God gave it to him.

For the main goal of this site, it’s not as big into showing the way, teaching us to see.  Partially because his eyes were just open.  He didn’t search or pursue, it just was.  He gives some instructions, but nothing necessarily new from other things I’ve seen, even then not much instruction at all.

What I did get is:

  1. Encouragement – Reading the story of someone who does see and believes all should is encouragement.  Very honest portrayal of himself and what he has seen.
  2. What to expect – His views into the Spirit have given me a better idea what is going on.  This helps me in picturing what may be there, and validating the little bits I feel like I’ve seen.
  3. God is moving.  It’s a confirmation that God is always working in the spirit all around us, and He is working for our good.

Overall, I really recommend this book.  It’s the fastest I’ve read a book in a while.  Had trouble putting it down to do normal life stuff.  Though it’s a tad discouraging in one aspect ( only because I let the enemy tell me it is ) in that he was given this gift as a child, that is completely overshadowed by the encouragement it did give to see what is available.  I’ve found myself not only pursuing that gift more, but cleaning up my attitudes and thoughts better now that I realize what it is doing in the Spirit and how it gives the enemy a foothold to attack.

I was working my way through Ephesians, mainly because of the prayers in Ephesians 1 and 3 that Kenneth Hagin talked about in his book “The Believer’s Authority” or perhaps “I Believe in Visions”, I forget which.  These were prayers he began praying daily in search of a deeper relationship with Christ.  Sadhu Sundar Selvaraj did a similar deal after reading Kenneth Hagin’s book.

Anyway, that was why I was in Ephesians, then I hit some interesting things in chapter 3.

To me, the very least of all saints, this grace was given, to preach to the Gentiles the unfathomable riches of Christ – Ephesian 3:8

Ever stop to think about what these “unfathomable riches” might be?  Do you walk like that?  I don’t.  I walk in a very known level of riches of the church, not according to some that we can’t even imagine.  These riches are available for us.  Later in this same chapter I found another phrase like this.

And to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God. – Ephesians 3:19

Now we find the “love of Christ that surpasses knowledge”.  I only rare feel the love of Christ which fills up my own heart, much less surpassing knowledge.  To experience that, you wouldn’t even be able to think straight.  What sort of love is this.

So I just looked back and forth in this chapter thinking upon these unfathomable riches and the love that surpasses knowledge which will fill me up in fullness of God.

What did I decide?

I want them.  I want to know this love and grace that is so far beyond me.  I want to understand what we have, to overflow all that I am.

Then I found the way.

For this reason I bow my knees before the Father – Ephesians 3:14

Paul was praying that because of these unfathomable riches, that they would know this love that surpasses knowledge.  To do this, he got to his knees and asked.

That’s it.

There is our path.

It seems to obvious, too easy.  We want to earn or deserve it.  We want to find the complicated path, because we feel the easy route doesn’t work for us.

Instead, we just get on our knees and plead to the Father.

“Father, show me these riches which you have given me in Christ.  Open my heart to know this love you have shown that surpasses knowledge.  It’s only in you I can find these.”

If you think about it, unfathomable means we can’t come up with it ourselves.  There is no option but revelation from on high.  Take your knee, pour out your heart, and receive the blessings your Father wants to lavish upon you.  Paul knew this was the path.  It’s only our culture of Bible studies, conferences and speakers that feel a person must teach us.  The Holy Spirit is here to do that work.

 

I’ve been spending more time trying to just pray in tongues.  I actually set a time for myself each day to set aside for praying and waiting.  I know I’m typically against “pray for XX minutes”, but it’s like I’m trying to discipline myself.  Just like in running for example.  First you go for a mile, then a mile and a half.  Once you get to a point where you can go long enough, then you worry less about the distance and more about the quality, the speed, etc.

So I’m praying in tongues, and as we all probably do, my mind wanders some.  In this instance I hit on being the Bride of Christ.  As in my previous post, I am thinking about I’m not necessarily the bride of Christ just because I am saved.   As I’m pondering there and praying in tongues, that voice comes in my head.  Same voice as always.  It’s on the topic I’m thinking, but I know it wasn’t me.  Too unexpected.  It’s that voice like you said it in your head, except you didn’t.

“If you want to be my bride, then woo me”

I know…. woo.   Who says that.  I blame Sadhu Sandar Selvaraj for that sort of British type word, but that’s what came out.  Feel free to insert pursue, attract, court, or any other better sounding word here.  The concept is the same.

If you want to be the bride, give Jesus a reason to ask.  Just as Revelation said “make yourself ready”.  Clean yourself up.  Put away the sin that smells.  Set your mind and heart upon the good things to keep clean.  Cloth yourself in good works to look attractive.  Compliment the Lord, make Him feel the love you have.  Give Him gifts and speak well of Him.  Show Him off.

That all hit me in a split second and the praying in tongues went right out the window.  I love revelation like that.  It’s like it short circuits your brain as you realize all the connections that concept just made.

This is perhaps my best answer for:

  • How to free yourself from sin
  • How to clear your mind of the world
  • How to be holy.

I am Holy, because I want my Lord to fall in love with me.

It’s that simple.

I wanted to post something about being the bride, so went searching my previous posts and realized I may not have posted these revelations about the bride.  Oops.  So before my next post, you get what I may have posted before, but I want to make sure.

 

And…. excerpt from something that should be available later.

 

Although I have no clear scripture for this, I believe there is a sort of progression to our relationship with God as we mature.  First, we are believers, for we accept God, but haven’t gone too deep.  We mature into disciples who are willing to follow God.  As we give more of our lives over, we can move over to bond-servants.  This is the title many of the apostles took.  Past this, I believe there are several other categories such as the sons of God, the friends of God, and even the bride.  That last one still surprises me.  I had long been taught that the church was the bride of Christ.  I believed that until the Lord opened up this verse for me.

And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb. – Revelation 19:9

It took me a bit to catch on and I can distinctly remember when the revelation hit me.  I don’t remember what started me on this topic, but one day I found myself desiring to know about the marriage of the Lamb.  I knew the scripture was in Revelation and searched it down pretty quickly.  As I’m pondering that scripture, the middle part caught me.  Blessed are those who are invited.  Think about it.

Do you invite the bride to the wedding?

Of course not.  The wedding is for the bride, you invite the guests to be witnesses and to share in the celebration.  What we find here is that the guests of the wedding are blessed, that they get to attend the wedding.  That one little statement breaks us up into at lease three groups.  First, we have the bride of course, then those who are invited to the wedding, and then the rest that aren’t.

A couple years ago I had a dream about Heaven.  I’m going to give the short version here.  Basically, I dreamed that I had died and there was a group of us coming into Heaven.  We were brought into Heaven with a guide and begin to make our way through.  As we walked through different parts of Heaven, some of the people were split off to go to their assigned areas in Heaven.  The overriding thought I can remember having as we went through different areas of Heaven, which was a remarkably happy and peaceful place, was that I wanted to be as close to Jesus as possible.  Each time a group split off, I was glad to still be moving toward the center.

This realization that I may not be part of the bride has hit me hard.  I love God.  I do.  Yet, I obviously love myself as well, and that must be fixed.  The God of the universe is willing to call me “His beloved”, but can I say the same?  You see, many are called, but few are chosen.

How’s that for a title.  Coming from the guy who likes to quote things like “God is love” showing how it all boils down to love.

Well…. here we are.

I’m stuck on a passage again.  This happens to me often enough.  Any time I want to spend time reading and meditating, this is the only passage that comes to me.  I can’t move past, I can’t move no, and I can’t make sense of it.  Granted, I’ve spent a lot of my free time on my “project”, so I haven’t had as much time just sitting in the Word as I should or want.  Also I’ve been off in audio books.  I digress.

I’m writing this as much to relay some information on as to just try to get this out of my head.  Sometimes just talking about something will force you to see it a little different, to look a little closer at a word, or something like that.

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight,  so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God. – Philippians 1:9-11

As with many other passages, I saw the you “may be pure”, and it caught my attention.  Now, section by section:

“And this is my prayer”

Not a command, but a prayer.  So this is more than just “do these things” but “God help me do these things”.

“that your love may abound more and more”

We need more love.   NASB says “love may abound still more and more”.  So their love is already abounding, but we want it more, and then even more.  But how is our love to abound.

“in knowledge and depth of insight”

NASB says “true knowledge and all discernment”.  That would be epignosis, as in experiential or as I say, revelation knowledge.  This isn’t knowing facts, but having them revealed to you.  Discernment is clear enough, seeing through the muck at the truth.   So love alone is not enough.  Just growing in love doesn’t get us where we are going.  No, we need that love directed by revelation and discernment.  This is where we use the love God gave us, but also lean upon him to direct that love.  We can’t just go out and love everything more.  That’s inefficient and wasteful.  We are to be love, but the act of love must be directed as God directs.  As we learn how to apply it, we need to abound there.

“so that you may be able to discern what is best”

Again, why love through those methods above, so we can do the best we can.  We need to find what is the best that God has for us and focus there.  Practice your discernment and wisdom.  Search out insights from God and apply them.  Live the best life you can.

and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ”

Again, NASB “in order to be sincere and blameless until the day of Christ”.  Not sure why I didn’t just start with NASB.  Oh well.  First, we walk this way that we may be pure.  Why is that important, because our relationship is built upon holiness.  The pure in heart see God.  The more pure we become, the more He can step in.  Next thought, “until the day of Chirst”.  Just another verse as proof that we can walk in holiness and purity.  Paul didn’t pray that we “try to walk pure”, or we walk “in a more pure manner”, or even “we are pure when Christ comes.  No, be pure until Christ comes.  And the way to reach purity, apply your love with discernment and revelation.

“filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ”

Have to admit, I don’t have much here.  What is the fruit of righteousness?  Looking at several other verses, peace is mentioned a lot, but it seems to be the fruit of a life lived in holiness.  The preparing of your soul and spirit by staying pure before the Lord to make you into His image.

“to the glory and praise of God.”

Always to His glory.  We live, that He may be glorified.  That others may see our love, and come to know that it is merely a bare reflection of the love God showers upon us.

Love with intent.  Find the truth, apply it, and love even more.

Sometimes all it takes is just 10 minutes during your workout where you set your eyes upon the Lord, still your heart, and be open, and you get a “download” as Paul Keith Davis likes to say.  That’s what happened last night.  I get the impression that the Lord is just bubbling over with things to tell me, only waiting that I’m still and humble enough to receive them.

I carry burdens, lots of them.  I suspect we all do.  It takes so little.

  • Spouse
  • Children
  • Job
  • Mortgage
  • Friends
  • Parents

Expectations are placed upon us by things around us.  Usually people, sometimes just ourselves.  There’s actually a Marriage devotional we went through called iMarriage that I’m reminded of.  According to them, the expectations we bring into the marriage are often the things that drives it apart.  Your spouse will most likely not live up to your expectations.  It’s ok to dream, but to expect is to place a burden.  When I expect my wife to make dinner sometimes and I continue to find myself making dinner, where do I go.  I go into my expectation, wondering why she can’t handle such a small thing.  What did I do that I have to do this.  Whine, whine whine.  Now I’m bitter.  That bitterness will just spread until it finds other reasons to reinforce itself.

Back to the point.  I can focus on the expectations.  My work expects me to keep everything going(that was super bad for a while), my wife expects me to do all sorts of things and remember stuff(oh boy), my child expects me to play all the time, I expect myself to work on my writing, and fix the house, and rake the leaves, and so on.  God expects me to do my quiet time and find time to wait quietly, and pray, and intercession.  Don’t forget worship.

In the end, I fail it all.

But Jesus…. my beloved Jesus.

Come to me, all who are weary and heavy ladened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your soul.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. – Matthew 11:28-30

We need to change how we live.  I need to, so I don’t get buried under the pressure.  What was Jesus yoke?  Easy.

“Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?” Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment.  And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ – Matthew 22:36-39

Love God, love others.

I can do it, sometimes.  When I am able to set myself aside.  I have to drop all my expectations, my fleshly desires, and my priorities.  Then I come to God empty.  Live small.  Make yourself small before the Lord.  Some days it took me a few minutes in the shower, another day a minute on my knees, another day 30 minutes of worship in the car.  Whatever way.  Come to God and bow before Him.  Get everything of yourself out of the way and Know Him.  When you get that mindset right, all the other stuff becomes so easy.  You come home and immediately clean up the dishes, clear the mess, and start some laundry because it’ll bless your wife to do it.  When you find a moment in the car, you praise the Lord because it’s pleasing to Him.  When sin comes, you answer as Joseph “How can I do such a thing and sin against my God!”

Set yourself aside.  Live small, so that He may be big.

 

The Spirit gave me this little nugget while raking leaves today.  I was thinking how I’ve often heard the response from people who don’t believe you can see God ( while living at least ) that “you can’t see God and live”.  The verse they’re referencing is from Exodus.

But,” he said, “you cannot see my face, for no one may see me and live.” – Exodus 33:20

There’s a lot of arguments I’ve heard to go against this, but I had an interesting new one today.  As I had that thought, the Spirit said to me, “Doesn’t that sound familiar”.  I thought so too.  It sounded similar to the tree of knowledge.

But you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.” – Genesis 2:17

But wait, Adam and Eve didn’t actually die when they ate from the tree.  Yet that’s what God said.  We realize that the death was more spiritual.  Their physical boides continue on.

So what’s to keep us from applying the same principle.  When they ate the fruit, a part of them ( spiritual ) died.  So when we see God, a part of us ( old man ) can no longer live.  When you come face to face with God, something will die.  It could be you, but it could also be the flesh in you that dies and gives way to something greater.

Ok, so I’ve had it for a bit, but finally started reading Gazing into Glory by Bruce Allen.  I knew of Bruce from the Lancaster prophetic conferences that he did with Sadhu Sundar Selvaraj and Neville Johnson for years, but never really listened much to him.  So I went back to look at the intro and realized this book was very relevant for my quest, so I started working through it slowly.  And slowly it was.  Like most good books, I could only go for about 10-15 minutes at a time before I had to stop and chew on things a while.  I actually haven’t finished, but I think I’m past the relevant parts for this post.

Guess what most of the book was about.  Seeing God, moving into the Spirit, working with God.  You know, all the stuff I’ve been pursuing.  Here’s some basic notes I took along the way.

  • First key – Passion.  Search with all your heart
  • Second key – Pure in heart shall see God
  • Third key – Obedience
  • A lot of talk about sanctifying our imagination.  Watch what you put into your mind, focus on Jesus.  ( Take every thought captive )
  • “Imagination is reality according to God”
  • “You’re as close to God as you want to be”
  • “Jesus is no respecter of persons”
  • Begin to practice His presence, focusing upon an image of Jesus in your imagination.  When you read the Bible, picture it.  When you’re longing for something from God, imagine it occurring.
  • Passion, passion, passion.

So if you’ve read much of my stuff, basically all the same stuff I’ve been taking from others.   Same things I’ve been trying to work toward.  This was a nice affirmation that I’m on the right track.  Almost everything he was saying, I could “nod” my head at as something I knew that I should be doing.  Sometimes it’s just nice to get another person’s input and realize you aren’t so far off.

The other encouraging thing was his story.  He worked his way into this.  He didn’t start with some big supernatural encounter as many others I’ve read.   He didn’t have a voice speak out to start talking.  No, he heard some of these truths and began to apply them in his life until he broke through.

It was a bit different than Neville or Sadhu, so that was good.  Followed more along the lines of Neville.  Use your imagination, sanctify it, focus it upon God.  If you’re passionate enough and stick with it, God will use that.

For me what I’ve taken is I’m falling short on two things here.  First the passion.  I get it for a couple weeks here or there, but don’t keep it strong like I should until I break through.  Second, focusing upon Jesus.  I’ll do it for a couple days, but it’s tough.  It’s tough to leave so much else out of your mind and focus to keep it upon the Lord.  Strange thing is when I do it, it continues to be more and more real.  Often I’ll stop and focus upon the Lord for a couple minutes and having this wave of love and peace flow through me, as if He’s right there ( which of course He is ).  It’s like each time I come back to these things, they’re a little more real.  If I can just hold firm this time.

 

 

 

 

I was bitter.

I find this happening a little too often.  Bitterness is a disease, but even more.  It’s like a cancer that spreads.  When you let it in, it tries to grow and grow.  It will consume you if you don’t cut it off.  I’ve seen it in too many others around me.  Yick.

That’s not my post for today, I just started bitter.  Some was directed at my wife (sorry honey).  You know how we all have expectations.  Well, my expectations weren’t being met.  As part of this, I was wondering why I would continue to do all the things I do.  You see, the Lord had taught me to love her and sacrifice for her especially in the times I don’t think she would deserve it.  That’s a different story for another day.  So here I am wondering why I keep doing that, and the Lord suddenly gave me 1 Peter 4:8

Above all, keep fervent in your love for one another, because love covers a multitude of sins.

I had always looked at this verse like that of God’s love.  He loves us so much it can cover over our sins.  Basically grace.  But that’s not what it’s tell me.  It’s telling me to love because that covers sin.  In the moment, the meaning was clear to me.  My actions of love for my wife would cover over results of my sins and keep the consequences of those.  You see, I have my own problems as well.  I wonder sometimes ( as I think we all should ) how our marriage goes so well when the two of us ( especially me ) have so many issues.

What I learned is that my love for here and the actions I take ( especially when I don’t feel it ), covers over many of my own shortcomings and has kept out marriage in the shape it is in.

So what is this telling me going forward.  It’s telling me just how important love is.  I am not perfect and don’t expect to be anytime soon ( I have hopes ).  I will sin, and that sin has consequences even though I am forgiven.  In the Spirit God sees me as sinless, but if I were to kill someone for example, I would still end up in jail.  Sin has a result, even forgiven sin.  Yet there’s another way.  Love.  An abundance of love will cover over the sins and make them like they didn’t exist.  So when I am so desperate for the Lord but know that I will still fall into sin, I should love Him even more.  Show love most especially in those times where it doesn’t make sense.

Why, because love covers my sin.  Covering my sin helps make me holy again.  Holiness is relationship.